well after he sqeezed a zit off his forearm i got the hell outta there
That shit is worth it...they got medicine for that now a days
Sleepwalking naked until I was 12 made it so much easier to get away with drinking at moms now.
I just wanted to hook up with a white guy to prove that i could go back.
you probably have like 11 voicemails from us, one is us singing my heart will go on while were fucking
i was drinking at the bar last night with a guy with no bottom teeth, wearing zubas and a polka dotted hat. if that isn't the definition of wisconsin, i dont know what is
On a lighter note, my mom and I were playing scattergories, and for "things that you keep hidden" we both put dildo. Proof that we really are related.
I would watch the shit out of some full house right now.
I have come to the conclusion that my perfect boyfriend is a cardboard cutout of Link with a dildo attatched. Also, Merry Christmas.
Tell me again why I left before the topless cake fight
And then I told him since the day he walked away to get over what I went through he lost the boyfriend right to ask why my bed is broken.
I take full pride in being the one that broke ur bed. Want to go for the sofa?
I just want a man to crawl into my bed with me and never crawl out. Anti socialism at his best.
She was just trying to do dick voodoo. Pretty standard stuff.
Girl... I just woke up with a bloody mary in a to go cup on my nightstand and two hours late for work.. I'm sorry i can't go out on weekdays anymore. Luckily my boss was just happy i was ok
He lit my hand on fire and bought me chicken nuggets. I'm in love.
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