problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
You were right. It hurts to walk today.
yeah that pretty much nipped itself in the bud when I realized i could see her whiteheads glowing in the blacklight
To put it in a frame of reference with which you're familiar, it was like making out with a golden retriever.
Well the pizza delivery man was either startled or incredibly intrigued to see me skateboarding in the living room by myself at 1 in the morning in ripped pantyhose
I mostly enjoyed dancing with him because his boner was scratching my bug bites.
Aqua-barf. When you are about to puke in the toilet but pass out face first instead...and then puke. WITH YOUR FACE IN THE BOWL. There is no escaping the puke ring you have on your face. I know first hand.
Can you send me a picture of you not naked, my mom wants to see what you look like
When I said to give it to me hard and fast, I didn't mean like 15 seconds fast.
are you just sitting in your hotel room drinking popsicle vodka?
.....well anything sounds bad when you say it like THAT
I'm home, and it turns out she didn't get it all. still picking Oreos out of my pubes.
A party without a piñata is not a party I want to attend.
I shit you not. Dude complemented me for being meme savvy. You could drown a toddler in my panties right now.
I don't remember much, but I remember he called me the dick whisperer, so it must not have been all bad.
With my son watching me, I pulled down my pants and shit in her trash can.
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