Looks like an M-80 went off in a lb. of pastrami
Now that you're back together are you gonna tell him you set his stuff on fire?
Stripperoke is exactly what it sounds...
I WALKED myself out of breath. And I'm lost I'm a Tim Hortons parking lot. That's how hungover I am.
Oh god. It's like a broken faucet. My guts sound like a bilge pump clogged with golf balls and cake frosting.
Just discovered i ordered the nhl center ice package back in september, the operator said there was a note next to the time I called, indicating I may have been intoxicated while calling (no clue why but it was noted)...meaning I was drunk...meaning ill never miss another sabres game...i love me and am beaming with self pride
We're following a guy carrying a door for beer pong at his place..join us when you are deemed sober enough to leave the hospital.
Okay. So I've done lines off a bible. But that's just for the sake of being cliché.
He finger blasted me like an angel dude
YALL MOTHERFUCKERS WANNA WATCH HEAVY METAL AND SMOKE WEED AND PLAY POOL AND DRINK BEER AND SMOKE WEED
I'm sitting naked on my bathroom floor and it remind me of us.
That's my way of saying I miss you
Of fucking course I get my period on Valentine's Day...
I wanna print it out and hang it on the fridge like parents do with good report cards.
oh the joys of a picture of a negative pregnancy test
Let the healthy eats/juice cleanse begin. Today is day 1
Have you cleansed yourself of the boy yet?
I lost my cyber virginity to a guy I barely knew in high school while a Togepi Plushie watched.
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