My sheets, bed, and bathroom are covered in blood. She needed 14 stitches after a trip to ER. This is the last white girl I ever hookup with.
Before I dignify that with an answer, let me get this straight. You're asking me if I wiped my ass on the towels?
He was like a foghorn with a huge penis.
NO. NO LET HIS PENIS TOUCH YOU.
Are you still goin to the xmas party?
Yaaaa why?
Jus making sure i will have nice people i know to put a blanket over me when i pass out in the field .
You were crying because you hate wine coolers but you really wanted to prove you could finish it
Omg he has a washer and dryer IN his apartment and lots of back up toilet paper. I went home with an adult. My uterus is pumping out eggs beyond my control.
Your feet probs hurt bc the cab driver kicked us out a mile from home after you wouldn't stop screaming "prohibition can suck my dick"
I told him that if he cleaned the bathroom, I'd blow him. You could eat off the toilet. Seriously, get over here. This is the cleanest you'll ever see it.
I've entered the world of uncircumcised penises. It's disgusting.
All she has to do is text me and my dick gets hard. It doesn't matter what it's about. Last text was about a homeless dude
Sex while Star Warsing is the best
Well I finally got to say all the things I wanted to say. Including telling him he looks like a naked mole rat
So it turns out that a Ford Focus does not fit in a Walmart cart return.
I don't think there's a ladylike way to tell this guy I want to sit on his face
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