he pissed his pants, and she still wants to hook me up with him. I try not to date guys with bladder control problems... Unless they're loaded anyway.
im having a hard time not telling ppl about ur bathroom story
so she finally agreed to being friends with benefits. not only did I take her virginity, when I woke up, she brought me French toast made with homemade bread in bed.
I worship thee.
Okay I've seen like three girls walking around crying today. Weird?
everyone's regretting their thursdays.
you are getting stockholm syndrome from your pubes
So even though we broke up apparently according to my voice mail you still like me, with smurfs while riding on a boat.
I'm writing my will in case I die this week, it'll be saved on my computer under: little 500 death scenario
Not going outside. I may melt into a puddle of wine
Just bought the plane tickets. Light headed. Blood rush to clit oh god blue clit. Mayday mayday vagina down!
ever had one of those days where you say fuck it and lick the inside of a bag of chips
Whoever jacked off in MY pong room on the bean bag with your fucking googles pick up your fucking cum towel you gross disgusting fucks. I said NO MORE jacking off in that room. I swear I will empty it out if this is going to continue.
They are like the regular squirrels and we are flying squirrels
what do you mean he's functionally heterosexual
dude it was our first time and her hair caught on fire from the candles on the nightstand
There is no way that actually happened!
the smell of burnt hair covered up the sweaty sex smell.
Just fucked my ex's brother. It is clear I dated the wrong one. Is it wrong for me to continue to fuck this one?
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