bl l w
this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
the guy in front of me just bought a pound of bacon, a bouquet, and a case of budlight, i want to see THAT makeup sex
Would it be cruel if i sold xanax instead of adderall to freshman unfamiliar to the drug-taking profession?
Quick question... Why were there condoms frozen into ice cubes?
Bring my lunch to work in liquor store bags is doing nothing for my career
just asked if they'd gift wrap go-go taquitos for you at 7-eleven
Yeah i just finished watching someone play ping pong with his penis it didn't fully register until after a few seconds
So i came so hard i almost passed out, where has this vibrator been all my life?
Did I tell you he put a lobster carcass on his dick?
Seriously, I really just burned my nipple making ravioli.. I'd explain, but no reasoning makes this acceptable:/
Lost and found: pink cotton underwear next to my bed and soaking wet Reebok socks or boxers in a plastic bag...in my fridge🤔
So I got a text from him saying "jacking off...thinking of you" I think I'm going to get a restraining order
you asked me how to turn on the ladder
He said when the pizza came I zip locked one slice and went to the couch and snuggled with it. Does that give you an idea of how my night was?
you poured beer in your mouth so you could be a beer pong cup for her to drink out of/make out with
Did it work?
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