Of course we end up in a gay bar... And I have to tell you there are some hot dudes here, should I pass around your Facebook?
i think i'm in class. and blacked out.
you said the mailboxes were turning into babies and they started crawling away. then you cried and asked me how you were gonna get your college acceptance letters
i knew it was time to break up with him once he pulled out the Halo foreplay costumes
Not sure. All I know is that she has a tight dark green skirt and I will not rest until I have used my teeth to rip it off of her
He's hot though. It's not like he JUST got out of prison. That was like months ago
151 hangover. Need apocalypse.
just once I'd like to not pass out before we leave the designated pre-drinking place
Well get back to your date and give him the ceremonial 1am handy and text me when your done.
so go get some goddamn bacon and lay in his bed naked. he'll love it.
If I get laid tonight it will 1.) Prove that the sex gods do in fact exist, and 2.) Show that I am one motherfucking badass bitch.
He is such a generous lover, I can look past the fact his name is fucking Bob.
I just want an early 40-something dude who is vaguely unencumbered, professionally driven and wants to put me in a ball gag.
so i went over to her house and we played crash bandicoot, ate calzones, and had sex all day. im in love.
Just shaved my balls on a moving train. By far the most dangerous stunt I've ever pulled
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