After last night I still want u
But please keep that on the DL
I can't remember last night. I must have yelled at your girlfriend til she cried again.
Yup.
she always winds up in the cupboards its nothing new.
And then the lady sheeps would bring me the finest grass to eat cuz im the sheep king and id have sexy smooth sheep fur
I remember fighting the chubby dude and the bouncer put me in the full Nelson. Woke up this morning with a dislocated shoulder. We need to finish the rest of this beer though
He just sent me a picture of himself naked while cooking pancakes and he made the caption "bitchin' in the kitchen"
Denial and avoidance are my survival strategies for 2013.
Denial, avoidance and beer.
I just talked this guy out of hooking up with me and gave him relationship advice. Am I a good person now?
multiple people will be seeing my nips tonight. not mad about it at all
I'm so hungover I can't taste anything
...and that's why girls with IBS don't paint their nails
I wish I could take a screenshot of how things literally look from my eyeballs right now
I'm not even 100% sure what it is, but if it involves Thor and Doritos, I'm in
My lack of taco bell is hindering me from seeing the good part of that situation
I'm still thinking about that amazing orgasm last night. I literally heard angels singing "Hallelujah!!"
Randomize
