the chick doesn't look like she's put anything in her mouth for weeks other than his dick.
Did you see 7 ppl got hurt at Talladaga?
Did they get their mullets stuck in an engine?
i woke up under my mattress pad with him laying naked next to me and his wwjd bracelet on my nightstand.
nice, that's exactly what jesus would do.
I swear god or herbie drove my car home
you dipped you banana in queso last night.
There are 3 guys sitting in the elevator in lawn chairs wearing sunglasses and holding beers. the hallway rugs are stuffed in a trash can. i've never been so glad to be sober.
We should have cut you off when you asked the can driver if you could ride in the trunk.
I was crying hysterically and you wouldn't stop petting my ear and shushing me every time I tried to say something.
if you do the accent, i'll wear the eyepatch
Ok how about tonight me and you get laid together. Same girl. Then she signs our dicks.
As weird as it sounds I would totally be down
He said he would pay my bar tab if he couldn't answer my question. He lost to the age old question of our youth. Why did pogs go out of style.
I want to get back to junior year skinny- without all the drugs.
Ok, now help me add to my topless picture collection, i'm going to make myself a calendar
Do you think you could cook pancakes while i blow you?
Guy from the bar last night left his number on my waterbill on the counter, at the bottom he put don't forget I can hook you up at Little Caesars I work their part time.
You sure know how to pick em.
Randomize