I've done 29 out of the 30 things to do to a naked man according to Cosmo. I don't know if that makes me innovative or slutty.
Genius.
oh hey just found a glowstick in my tits. fuck yes new years eve
Living well is not the best revenge. Fucking his brother is.
it was such a weird mix, KFC and penis
At beerfest, hammered, going to try to not get naked in public but i cant make any promises
It's like you are the superhero of getting jizzed on
he tried to do a one handed cartwheel to showoff but knocked himself out cold. fuckin jagerbombs will kill that man.
I would seriously fuck her so hard, her contacts would pop out of her eyes.
Lets just put it this way. Im meeting his nana after a mind blowing orgasm.
i just woke up to her giving me a toothy BJ so I had to break into your bedroom and steal about 4 condoms. Sorry for waking you. :(
Nothing says "single girl" quite like Pinot Grigio and canned ravioli at 11:30 pm....
I made an executive decision to rename my Resume file to something other than MONEYMONEYMONEY.
Every morning should start with 2 orgasms and a shoulder massage
If you wear a peguin suit you MUST send me a picture!!!
If I didn't have booty calls, my apartment would never get clean
Randomize
