Dude, I just saw a sixteen year old girl in a catholic school uniform buying a pregnancy test... With a coupon!
Why am I getting the stink eye from these people? They're acting like BYOB isn't kosher in a laundromat.
she's bipolar. she literally has TWO facebook pages. one for each personality. this. bitch. is. crazy.
Forever 21 now has a maternity line. Even more of an incentive for me to get pregnant at a young age.
at which point I apparently ran in and shouted "I made the sex with that one!"
If I threw up, how do I still have the same piece of gum in my mouth from the beginning of the night?
Did not foresee holding down food at work today to be a struggle today
Touche. Dude, I fastened garters. Drunk. I deserve a medal from a drag queen.
No we are not "bros" because I came out of my moms vagina& you went in there.
After a few mimosas, my mom started sharing her plans to move out of the house and into a retirement village so she can be the youngest one there and find herself a "nice old sugar daddy." Needless to say, break has not started off well...
I'm like an air traffic controller of women. It's a very similar job. Well spaced and gentle landings are good. When they meet, it's bad. Explosions bad. Dying screaming burning children bad.
Halloween is the end of the singles holidays they don't start again until st. Patrick's day we better get wifed up or it's going to be a long winter lol
I woke up with a black eye and a buttplug...not sure I really want to know what happened.
She is carving a little coffin out of some wood for her hamster that died. I'm flying home tonight.
I'm just going to assume my unresponsive booty calls are just preparing for the women's march tomorrow
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