She's holding my hand. I'm going to kill myself.
STOP SENDING ME DANCING JESUS FORWARDS.
I apparently tried to stop my spending of money by sealing the top of my wallet with gum
we went through the mcdonalds drive through and you asked for a free sample of their fries to see how you liked them.
it was a 10 min screaming orgasm. i don't care that you were next door and didn't appreciate all the noise.
you were fixing your hair in the bathroom mirror and then fell backwards through the locked stall while she was in mid pee and fell on her lap.
i'm gonna start fucking more girls with asthma. help feed my ego.
when you tell me you got me a birthday present, I have to assume it will show up in a drug test.
And my cat won't make me food. She's a bitch
Lol what? Monday night impromptu acid drop was the alternative.
I seriously want to say to him "Do you know how many blow jobs you could have gotten this summer?"
YOU BROUGHT HANDCUFFS TO THE WHITE ELEPHANT EXCHANGE AND DIDN'T TELL ME???
He sent me a snap of him eating a tamale shirtless. I think I might be in love.
LOCK HIM DOWN.
I'm in the liquor store and fucking "Wannabe" by the Spice Girls is playing. IM ALREADY ASHAMED OF MY REASON FOR BEING HERE, GIVE ME A BREAK.
Omg I got up from his bed and almost did a header into the wall because I came so many times I forgot how to walk.
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