when I'm not with you everything just looks like crayon scribble
I haven't had sex in so long I'll probably find some stranger, feel guilty, go w/o sex for several months and do it all over again...always something to look forward to
we screwed to my bar mtzvah tape, I became a man while watching myself becom a man
He walked me home last night across campus while i fed him pasta out of a solo cup at 3 am.
lets be honest. she's not NEARLY as much fun to fb creep since she got out of rehab...
just wrote a 6 page paper on my blackberry. including 3 sources. college is teaching me good things so far.
Someone just bought me a one liter long island and call me maybe is on. I'm going to die
Just found an unopened tied g of coke on the floor in her room... she thinks the maintenance guy dropped it earlier today. This takes the cake for sketchiest apartment.
I just found out that order of 30 Beefy 5-Layers last weekend has achieved legendary status among the Taco Bell employees. Is there a Stoner Achievement for that?
I feel like she is getting all kinds of bacterial exposure that may otherwise have been avoided had she been wearing pants
Do you have pictures of my pancakes
I need to show the world
They are the pancake equivalent of eventual wife
Gramp just called her sex-on-a-stick. AKA HE CALLED HER A WHORE. My 75 year old grandfather just called your ex's new thing a whore.
Can we relax the "married man" rule just once?
i just got carded for condoms. wtf.....this is new. isnt safe sex a good thing?
She asked what a chaser is. I died a little inside, please come back..
Randomize