i threw up in a trash can last night at kellys irish times. but in a trash can because i'm a lady
Dude she has a bf and shes on lockdown more than Nelson Mandela in 95
and i think we compared dick sizes, then high fived...
this bucketlist has just become an excuse for me to be slutty, and i'm not even ashamed
I only keep her as my best friend so she wont hook up with my ex.
oh dont worry, my liver will give out way before i get skin cancer
Dude it was a mini horse. It obviously only eats mini things.
You kept saying,"there's a seahorse in my stomach, who's trying escape". This was after the curtains attacked you.
I said we should get a taxi and you were waving down cars, three of which were cops and one of them slowed down and shook his head then kept driving
He didn't think we needed a taxi
Note to self: the judgement that occurs when unrolling your last 5 which was used to snort drugs the night before, to pay for alcohol before noon on a Monday is worth just sucking it up and taking an overdraft fee.
Wait a min, you had drugs last night?!
drinking vodka, listening 2 smh at 530am slow cooking beef stew. you'll enjoy the stew and worry abt me in the morning. bon apatite
Well after we were arrested you just kept chanting "Like a good neighbor state farm is there"
I wouldn't call us friends exactly. Honestly I just hang out with him so I can hit on his girlfriend. They won't last long, and I'll be there to pick up the scraps
Just a little drinking. So much fun and love. The world is a shiny wonderful sphere in the sky so why shouldn't we celebrate?
your mission the party friday: cockblock me at ALL costs. I've cheated on my boyfriend twice. I feel like three times would be crossing some sort of line...
and no, I don't care how how hot he is
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