Drinking in an igloo changes everything.
Please get rnbert tn get chebk h'm in i'm no dead when he getr gome
Just charged fat mistake $3 for a beer.
Also, I'd like to add that that I'm not quitting my job, my boss fed me shots at 11 am this morning.
please visit steve this weekend, he is getting mature and responsible and shit which scares me.
Woke up and there was a kayak in the pool. Are you alive?
New high score, I made the stripper choke me while I was getting a lap dance last night
When I see myself in tank tops and push up bras I seriously wonder why I'm not President.
You should come by for the fire station blow job tour
You're not married and none of these idiots are committing to you so whore it up on whore island
Can we go to pirate hooker whore island then
Hydrocodon makes you feel like a fairy made out of pudding
yeah i wanted to show him what i was missing, so i decided to send him a seductive picture, like the ones where the girls are eating strawberries and whipped cream. well i didn't have those, so i sent him a picture of myself naked eating a bagel
I know this shouldnt be a problem, but there are too many women hitting on me. I dont know what to do
Guess who just set half their backyard on fire.
Please tell me youre joking.
Nope. on the brightside though, im really gonna quit smoking this time.
Im glad your laughing because im currently convincing my penis you didnt mean it and its all gunna be ok.
Randomize
