His facebook profile says he's interested in men, but i'm choosing to ignore that
So after the reception we snuck back into the church for drunken hook up. we passed out there and woke up in time for 6am mass still dressed from the wedding. spiritually trashy or classy?
I feel like I'm sitting in a sleigh of puddy. It's not a bathtub though because you need a sleigh to go down a mountain.
Everytime I know she spent a lot of time on her hair for one of our dates, I intentionally cum on the top of her head. That's how she knows I pay attention.
you're being fucking weird and i don't like it. text me when you're not being the after picture on a poster for rehab
Omg no. We ate a raw pumpkin last nighr. We dipped it in BBQ sauce.
I went in to wake you up this morning and you had a condom draped across your throat like a necklace. There were no boys in the house last night, what were you doing?
New drinking game: Drink while you Drink. I'll explain the rules when I see you, needless to say, it's not difficult. Unless you enjoy sobriety, humanity and life. Bestest.
We were taking body shots by lunch. I love college.
I just made my mom buy me lube. I've reached a new level of broke.
Don't make me do math I'm drunk and full of chicken
I'm now forever going to blame miss frizzle for making me the sexual deviant that I am today
Im going to the gym...covered in the Brazilians cum
And how is that different than any other weeknight in your world
Your slutty phase was the highlight of my year.
Rationing the toilet paper. Only one wipe allowed. I'm scared to move too much.
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