you win again, gameday.
I can only be a whore so many days outta the week.
Samesies
found the other keg... it's in the tree
My sole motivation for showering this morning was to masturbate. Something is wrong here...
The doctor put me on 3000 mg of amoxicillin a day. Which, for a sinus infection, seems pretty excessive to me.
Maybe he was just trying to knock out any potential ghonorrhea you might be carrying around.
Ah, my reputation precedes me.
I'll just dance on top of the ping pong table, and if it's stable enough for that, then it's stable enough for sex
of course we have a beer bong
how else would we feed our christmas tree
this probably sounds so sketchy, but hes going to jail in a month so he needs a place to crash for now. Hes sick though, and hes paying half our rent
This is the most boring acid ever. I feel like a child. But thats okay, I've been a child before, its nothing new.
I think I'm going to contact pbr and see if they'll sponsor our dreams
Today is all about not throwing up, where the fuck are my keys and does anyone know what happened to that guy in the panda suit my roommate had sex with last night.
It's nice out. . But after I almost put a bag of chips in the microwave to make nachos. ..I figured it best to not venture too far from the couch
the walk of shame isn't very shameful when your mom tells you she's proud of you.
Please wake up and help me figure out how I woke up on the floor with my head under the couch
half way down the stairs my legs said fuck this and i just fell the rest of the way...
Randomize
