I cant go down on him yet. All ive had to eat is olives and percocet. semen would only add to tomorow mornings discomfort.
They found an open window, climbed through and proceeded to arrest half the party. These campus cops are like fucking ninjas.
Halloween has nothing on dressing up as as the INS on cinco de mayo
Robbie told me you spent 10 mins discussing the curl in his hair and that you said "with that curl in your hair, you'll go far"
I think I'm going to wait until after Halloween to call off the wedding. No need to ruin my favorite holiday.
For some reason I knew you were going to smell like strippers and burritos when I hugged you.
I ended up with a bullet proof vest and I still don't know his last name.
At this point can I suggest a mail away bride. You judge Nick but you are a strange dude and that may be your ticket.
There are reggae songs being written about me...where have I gone wrong in life?
So he's compensating for a really small penis. Either that or he's a drug lord.
I'm sure if Robin Williams was still with us he would want you to see boobs.
My cousin was arrested on a class b felony for selling meth out of the back door of McDonald's where he worked. Apparently it was the extra special sauce.
It was a career choice to be sure... Mistakes were made.
Well I mean I HAD done a pretty good job of not pooping myself through the years
Google imaged your anal issues. Seems fuckable still.
He ate me out while I was wearing a canada goose parka and a dress hand crafted by a seamstress from yellowknife. I came while watching the northern lights. Most arctic orgasm ever.
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