If that ambulance is off to save our dignity, please tell them it's too late...
I love the progression of these pictures. I go from cute to Courtney Love
I didn't realize he wasn't circumcised... it looked like the Unibomber...
so the last visual we have of him for the next 87 weeks is him outside on the ground rolling around yelling I HATE BLOWJOBS
She literally called herself a shamefully bad decision. Of course I slept with her. Best bad decision ever
Subtly mention that I'm not a lesbian. I would only go for rebecca's nipples because they're pierced and I like shiny things.
In all seriousness, if tomorrow night becomes a heated game of Which Ex Gets To Take The Plastered Birthday Girl Home, I'm going to bow out with my integrity intact.
We somehow managed to get the sumo-wrestler costume into the washing machine, but I don't think the cupcake icing completely came off... And it still smells like tequila.
We just leapfrogged all the way to the bar.
You want to get day drunk this afternoon and watch these guys build a house across the street?
It's Been clinically proven that people who have sex 6 or more times per week are happier than those who don't. Just and FYI. For your mental health. From a soon so be psychologist. Who is drunk.
Still not over the fact that we prayed to Jesus to help us win beer pong
My face feels like a midget just gave birth to quintuplets
A real best friend would support the hoe in me. Not remind me of what happened the last time I slept with a boss
Just called to hear your voice and talk about pizza.
Randomize
