That's the last time we joust in Radio Flyer wagons after margarita night.
If I'm gonna go to jail I'm gonna be wearing a poncho
Nothing like puking into an empty cooler at a red light on the way to get plan b.
It's just like riding a bike. Only it's a dude's face.
Please high five our old drug dealer for me please.
I've decided I want to blow you wearing a santa hat.
Aren't rabbit ears more seasonally appropriate?
My liver was like a college freshman on spring break. It would've danced topless on tables if it could have.
Also, even though this really sucks now, we will look back on this one day and laugh at the time we all got arrested on Thanksgiving
We could all 3 jump out of a cake in just tophats. A true marble cake.
My New Years Resolution is to get everyone to start talking like a 40 year old douchebag. From now on, you will only refer to me as Chief.
i am one fart away from being 2 for 2 on this whole shitting my pants thing.
seriously, who doesn't want to get shitfaced and have sex to the backstreet boys?
Okay so the couple who keep propositioning people for threeways are def siblings not bf/gf
So are you gonna do it or no you said they're hot
You think you can just send me a picture of your dick and everything will be ok?
Yep.
That married penis I’ve been riding offered to pay off my student loans. I was going to break it off because he has lousy stamina. Is being debt free worth putting up with mediocre sex?
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