i miss you so much
i miss you too
oops, did i send that to you? i meant to send it to the money you owe me
She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
Currently having a discussion about how bad cheating is with the girl im dating and the girl im fucking. This might be a sign that i need to reassess my life
Day 3 of Lent and I would already kill a puppy if God would give me permission to masturbate
i was surprised by the severity of his small dick condition
It could have went better. They kicked us out of the casino and I drunkenly whipped her across the face with a fishing pole. Long story.
Just came during my obgyn appt. I need to get laid.
we're meeting twins and drinking tequila. i love life
Withdrawals are gods way of saying "you're still my bitch"
I want to wear Christmas sweaters with you.
I have to go buy generic plan b after work. I don't even leave for the new semester for another 11 days. I think I just leveled up in sluttiness
I just noticed, at some point last night I got on iTunes and purchased over 100 classical piano songs.
I saved a sauce packet from taco bell that said "Free me" to use in my next break up.
Do u think the bouncer will let me in with a giant stuffed snake?
Well, you started screaming "I dont know you GO AWAY" to your mom when she was holding your hair as you threw up in her garden.
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