either fucking kiss her or kick her ass to the curb. Either way I can hear everything you are saying
we're chasing vodka with high fives
At the Phils game. My gay buddy just wanted up to a bunch of Mets fans and said "I'm gay, and even I think Mets fans are a bunch of fags." I love this fuckin town.
"Not only do I bring a guy back to my hotel room....But I bring one back for my friend who's passed out drunk. Now that's what we call BESTfriends"
Think about if the incredible hulk and king kong had a retarded baby. That's the sound she made in my ear the entire time I fucked her.
dude you said you were going to be a human flag and climbed the telephone pole and fell in front of a car
For once I want to have sex without having to google the after effects of it.
My going away gift was all of them dancing around with solo cups on their dick and balls...these are my friends
Probably not well advised, but you're welcome to stop by if your not ready to end your night. You know, for Thanksgiving's sake.
He was just lying on the living room floor watching Star Wars with six empty pack of cigarettes and two empty cases of beer.
In his defence I guess I did take the bed, couch and dining room set in the breakup.
I may have had sex with him and told him we wasn't worth my time then went home and made mashed potatoes
if it looks like there's being an exorcism being performed you know your doing something right.
This whole pope visit thing is ruining me having sex.
I've never met a penis that didn't think I was awesome.
Didn't know my clit could produce that many orgasms in one night. Fuck my husband; think I might have to become a lesbian.
Randomize
