So my mouth tastes like dick. Does that explain how our talk went?
He left the bathroom door open so i would hear him masturbate in the shower to make me feel guilty for not putting out but it just turned me on cause i like guys masturbating. weird?
The dutch village is so much worse hungover. Fuck them and their wooden shoes.
My eyes got the double whammy. Once with pepperspray from the riot the other with cum. Both of which i did nothing to deserve.
Shaving your vagina at 8 months pregnant is not an easy chore.
I was in the shower, he came in, had me give him a blow job, and left. I'm pretty sure I was just booty called. While taking a shower.
Dude, you walked in on me 5 times each times you had a different person with you. And each time you lifted the covers up and said 'whats going on in here'
Well, find something you can use as a snorkel and be aware of your surroundings.
Whoever said that remembering a girls name is a basic rule for getting laid has never met me.
I blacked out for most of the day but apparently I still met with my prof. I made notes...
First thing I find in the car I just pick up from my grandpa? A discount card for the strip club down the road from his apartment. The force is still strong.
Not sure how but he broke three of his fingers while giving a blowjob. How does someone that accident prone survive to adulthood?
My good Christian morals say no, but my complete disregard of anything related to religion says yes
OMG WE ARE UP TO THREE MINORS WORKING HERE. I AM NOT READY FOR THIS MID LIFE CRISIS.
I hope no one at work can tell or smell that I have tequila in my hair and I haven't showered for days
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