He came through my line today and bought designer impostor perfume, just for men gel, and astroglide. I almost DIED.
I've had a Margarita with salt, but I have to say I was impressed by the Stoli and Sprite rimmed with adderall
After he told me that it's up to him to carry on his family name, I almost felt bad for not letting him cum inside me.
This went bad. Everyone is crying, i dont know why and I am really uncomfortable.
Yeah well I used to see how many bud lights I could slam down during the pledge of allegiance, my record was 4, but I could do better now.
Crashed the mayor's bday party, no list for some reason. Wore suits. Ludacris was there.
Thinking about adopting a 16 yr old here. Her name is Abby and she likes vodka. We've bonded. I need a sober driver n e ways...
Okay the common myth about putting tampons in you nostrils for a nose bleed is busted. It just starts coming out through your throat.
JOY: That feeling when you crack open a handle for the first time, and the flow limiter comes off with the cap.
We spilled a whole bottle of mouth wash and then proceeded to roll around and make out in it. At least I smell minty fresh.
Wearing scrubs to buy plan b so I look like I have my life together.
it would be a downgrade if your vagina tasted like skittles
Not sure when or why this happened but I just stopped giving a shit about everything
Dipping my sugar cookies in a glass of fireball and creme soda. This is holiday spirit
taking shots alone in my kitchen before I go learn to give a lapdance. when did this become my life?
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