I'm just sayin. Is it sad that I spent my last dollar on a hamburger just to get a paper bag to huff out of?
soo apparently i was out of money so i stayed in the bathroom for an hour-ish passing out paper towels for money..needless to say i got kicked out
fter the third song from an iPod commercial played I realized how much that frat sucked.
Now he's talking about how he's writing in a journal because he doesn't remember "his thought patterns when he was in elementary and that's distressing". I'm walking home. Fuck this.
Turns out they use me as an example of What Not To Do at freshman orientation. My little brother told me.
My mom said I should get that 'not fucking anybody' problem fixed.
Hootey the Owl eats a mean pussy.
Um, OK. WTF?
The guy from the Halloween party. We finally hooked up. Went down in me for 45 mins. Came 4 times.
Suppose hypothetically u received a request for face time communication with a gentleman who looked astonishingly like a penis. Would you indulge him in conversation? Hypothetically of course.
He walked up to anal ring toss like he was going to win you a teddy bear
Apparently hitting a bong with your mouth half numb is hilarious but frustrating!
I need you there. I need someone to glance at when other people inevitably annoy me.
Uhmm, it's called hentai.
I DON'T CARE WHAT IT'S CALLED I DON'T WANT TO SEE IT ON MY WORK COMPUTER
Fall is here I will miss walking downtown in nothing but paint and pasties
He thought I was gay. I had to explain I just really like wearing flannel.
You’re a genius! I just walked in, shut the door, blew him and left. He could barely move afterwards and was a hot mess at the presentation. He already sent me a calendar invite for another meeting
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