Free body shot off of Sarah. Expires never.
Sadly no. But I was pantsless when they came to get me. Which made me miss you...
If someone cant be won over with guacomole and tequila they are not worth your time.
after a month anything with tits is on the radar
My gaydar just like overheated and exploded watching the male figure skaters on the olympics
It's going to be nice going to the airport without drugs taped to my balls like last year.
This inappropriate post strip club text brought to you by Cheetah of Palm Beach and vodka. Blowjob in the champagne room and the clap for the low low price of your paycheck.
she said i was like a little lamb and she felt bad for luring me into her den of sin. then she blew me.
Being a virgin isn't supposed to be this easy for you.
Because at some point last night we decided that shotgunning beers from a paint stick was a good idea
Mike found the condom wrapper on the washing machine and looked at me and said "Magnum? NICE girl. Get that nut!" then proceeded to puke in a cup
Lets trade lives
And i will lay in bed and piss all over everywhere, drink whiskey and have sex with married bears
Def over. He sent me a nude selfie but cropped it right above his junk. Total Silence of the Fucking lambs looking.
Question #1: Why am I on my living room floor? Question #2: Where did the bloody footprints come from? Question #3: Why are there two McChickens next to the wine bottle?
I can't handle more than one dick at once. I become crazy. It's hard to be mellow and free spirited and polygamous at the same time.
Its not that hard to understand he's my holiday boyfriend, we ignore each other most of the year except on holidays when I give him head
Randomize
