Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
You are possibly the most enthusiastic, likable bad influence I've ever met.
you sent me the whole alphabet, one letter a text. it took 15 minutes to read them all
did you really just refer to me me as an old fashioned penis?
You just kept yelling at the cabby "I own this cab" and insisted on smoking with all the windows up
It was honestly like he was directing a porno or something. he kept telling different people to grab other people's boobs, it was all very artistic.
One of my students in my 8am class brought me a Tim Hortons cup with a bloody Mary in it. Clearly, I didn't manage to look not drunk when I ran into him at Denny's at 4am. Who decided to let me teach?
Thank you for not puking on my lap during the first class of the semester. And fuck you for doing it in the second.
If i ever die cab you make sure bag pipes are at my funeral they are awsome
was I really that bad?
you army crawled across the kitchen floor, turned the cat into "super kitty" and crawled into the dog cage
THEIR PENISES MATCH. I JUST REALISED THAT. THEY HAVE IDENTICAL DICKS. OH GOD.
Do you remember making out with the dude in the back of my cab last night?? You said his mustache tickled your tongue.
It's like everything I need in life within a five block radius: booze, toilets, dogs, dicks.
jesus, I think that canada gold metal game has completely changed all rules of acceptable drinking habits, I was fucked untill noon and I just got invited to go party when I get off work...at 600am...and NO ONE understood why i was hesitant
I need to stop adding people I want to bone on LinkedIn.
..... starting now
Randomize