Hey, what are you up to?
Drinking wine with the guys and watching 7 Pounds.
Looking back I guess I could have changed that to beer and Die Hard.
I hid 4 bags of cocaine in your house. Have fun finding them
I just realized that if I marry him I will have the same last name as spiderman. this makes my decision so much harder.
She used my dick as a microphone to sing "any way you want it" I'm in love.
yeah he was eating me out and i didnt know someone made popcorn so I thought the smell was comming from my vagina
wtf
Funny. I made out with his brother for the first time in a bathroom too.
five cans of playdoh and a game of guess whose penis ...
WHY DIDN'T YOU INVITE ME TO RUN THROUGH TACO BELL'S SPRINKLERS AT 4AM?!
this dude just showed up to the party with a falcon
In other news, I apparently ate my retainers while rolling last night.
i stole nothing, broke nothing, and stabbed nothing. aren't you proud of me?
come home. I need you. I'm too hungover to deal with this hangover alone
You kept trying to make cocktails with my protein powder last night...
Life update - currently drunk off my ass in the yoga room of SFO at 5:30 in the morning.
I felt like a slutty ass cruella devil driving your old car, And I got in a fight with your wipers
Randomize
