I just got back to Nicks and I shoul dnot have drank this much when I have to work at 7AM!!!!!
i jus seen this fat chick walk buy look like she had don king coming out her arm pits..
then mid-sex he looked at me and said "i hope this is as good for you as it is for me" and kept going.
I just used an app to identify a song that was playing in the background of a porno. May god bless your soul steve jobs.
All she does is lay in bed and watch golden girls and masturbate all day...
It's inspiring.
Omg. I bid $3000 on a cave in Afghanistan on EBay last night.
No that means he must've used the nipple clamps
Feeling better?
I can stand long enough to do the dishes finally. Been trying that all day.
I just got hit on at the bar by a guy who used his mother as a wingman, she was pretty convincing. Only in Stratford.
So a guy died and our dates revived him with CPR. Good night?
Well I either feel like the fat girl or very accomplished because his bed is now broken in three places
I'm glad we can *facepalm* it together over the married couple we fucked separately.
I have beer and butt plugs...pretty sure I will find a way to entertain myself while I wait
she wants homewrecking advice
are you gonna teach her your ways?
obvs. i'm like her yoda.
Just looked at the TV in the bar for the weather report. Didn't want to walk home drunk during a tornado warning
Randomize
