there's a guy here who looks like a hipster got a hold of obama and gave him a makeover.
Seeing Harry Potter 3D stoned: Pro- giant redheads w/cute accents. Con-weeping for stoners who only had Pink Floyd laser shows.
If you die in college, do you die in real life?
That's the last time I fill my pockets with sushi.
Dude pussy is like music. For every person who pays for it, there are thousands more getting it for free.
He said to me this morning that we should finish these beers, go and get plan B then on the way back, go to the pub to celebrate the death of our baby. I love Manchester.
Just blew a perc off the traytable on my flight, spring break has begun!!
A man in denim coveralls just shotgunned a beer on the dance floor
I'll even give you a complementary welcome blowjob.
I agreed not to hook up with any randoms while she's on vacation, if that isn't a show of good faith then I don't know what is...
I know I've never told you this before.. but Gyro sauce makes everything okay.
Whenever someone tells me they've never met a bisexual, I feel like a majestic fucking unicorn.
So I crawled off the trampoline to puke in the neighbors yard. Wonderful house guest right here
my goal is to never have a bac of 0.0 the whole time while in the state of florida, which means i have to chug a beer before i cross the state line
There's a fuckload of syrup all over the floor.
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