I wanna passion pit in your ass
Today I made a list of everyone I have had sex with...there is more than double my age...
I can't ever handle being "that girl" again. At least not until next semester.
I understand. Hypothetically what should one do after throwing up in the shower?
He fell off the roof... he clearly has not been preparing for summer.
One last question would your parents let me sleep in your bathtub for the night?
You kept asking the bartender if you could "buy a dollar".
Thank you. Next to bondage, soft American Apparel t-shirts are the best things you've taught me about.
I wanted sex but got Ace Ventura: Pet Detective, instead. Then I had to drive 30 minutes home wet. Worst booty call, ever.
So it's ironically funny that my psychiatrist's office and my cocaine dealer's house are on the same street
Dude. She was wearing nothing but Wonder Woman panties and a flag for a cape and sneaking around leaving PBR's by passed out people for the morning. She called herself the 'Merica Fairy.
Why haven't you proposed already?
I AM NOT LOSING TO SOME FICTIONAL CROSSDRESSER
You'd be proud...I've an early morning wake up booty call...he should be here around 6am ish...I told him to wake me nicely.
Do you remember vividly describing the shape and girth of my cock to that girl last night?
My body isnt used to all this fresh air, sun and booze....ok well maybe just the fresh air and sun...its used to the booze.
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