She said her name was "party"
I smell stomach acid.
thanks for being my friend even though im irresponsible with my vagina
And no, shaving doesn't make it look bigger, either
no. i seriously look so gross with this sunburn. i wouldnt even wanna bang myself. and im really into myself.
I decided that not getting a job after college is gods way of telling me I will make a great housewife
only my mom would pack illegal paraphernalia in a care package..
Living well is not the best revenge. Fucking his brother is.
I can't get a boner in the bathroom of a buffet.
Aw c'mon. You have to see if the spinning penis rumor is true.
That's some primal shit right there. My vagina is all like CONSUME HIM AND HIS FRUIT HE WILL GIVE YOU SONS!
Would your heart desire to drink copious amounts of alcohol tonight?
So I'll bring my machete and we can smoke your shit.
Out of context, that is a hilariously scary message.
bought even stevens on dvd and enough weed and pizza bagels to last us a week.. ready to get snowed in?
You made me promise I wouldnt let you play "fuck fuck goose" with a 40 year old ever again.
Randomize
