it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
just woke up. wallet empty. bottle empty. tattoo in pen on my arm. smell like bad sex. woke up alone. and wall-e is playing on my computer. need answers.
Do vagina's smell?
went to the gyno and found out that i have a birthmark on my clit. its like god gave guys a little help when it comes to getting me off.
I'm trying to decide if I want to bring home my 'beer champion' trophy or my chem books.
I woke up with someone else's vomit on my ass. That's how I'm doing today.
and on the fourth day, god made foam parties.
If its allowed to Tornado at 830am then Im allowed to have a beer and a cigarette at 830am
I feel like I'm sitting in a sleigh of puddy. It's not a bathtub though because you need a sleigh to go down a mountain.
Bad idea to be in a car concussed. I just described his dick as an elevator. I think i meant escalator, i dont know
I'm going to pound you from behind over a table at the bar while I pull your hair and call you a whore...please pass along that message to Rob
I'm not the one who gave a guy that lives next door to my grandmother a blowjob in a pub bathroom in Ireland, you have no room to judge.
Say what you want about my van, but I've got more action there than in my apartment. A body pillow and a joint still go a long way!
You know Sunday Funday was a success when 'puke and rally' came at lunchtime on Monday.
Shriek
If my plane goes down do me a favor. Break into my house and get the batman costume and swing out of my bedroom.
Randomize