I hate my date so much right now for even thinking I want to do the electric slide.
if creeping was an olympic sport, i would be a lock for the gold right now.
No. one of us needs a degree and I am already the alcoholic friend. I can't do everything
Urine might work for jellyfish stings, but we found out it doesn't work well for nose bleeds...
did i really just refer to you as "the mid season replacement"
Yo send me the pic of me stickn my dick in the paint bucket last night
I fail to see the problem of enjoying a glass of wine while I poop...
the point I'm tryimg to make is that you didn't need to take the whole box in with you
The other day I was really high and I felt like my words were coming out of my mouth in flowers...I don't know.
I'm just going to have crazy good sex with him until one of us developed feelings that works in the movies right?
So, I actually said the words "but face tattoos are sexy"
When the state fair security guard came to yell at her for having outside food and drink she threatened to kick him if he tried to stop her and then she proceeded to chug the whole bottle.
classic
So anyway, I'm just floating along life with my vibrator and low expectations.
We had a pink drink in honor of my underwear and apparently I made out with our bartender... a few times
I feel like I got hit by a car. But a small car, like a Beetle or a Mini or something.
His bedroom is the preferred destination of MILFs, cougars, recent divorcees and sexually frustrated wives
His penis is my hero
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