Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
The night began with "let go home early so we can study for my 9am final" and ended with "show me your boobs for a free pack of gum".My breasts are worth 14 sticks for a dollar.
I am going to be in the room whjen you have your first child and spit on its face before its even all the way out of you.
i hate that site..its like every vagina you dont wanna see
my new ipod has external speakers and a video camera...all i can think about is how much more convenient it would be for me to make a pretty decent sex tape
we found you standing over and eating out of my neighbor's garbage can
Accidentally spilled a drink on her roommates skirt, offered to clean it, and got a blowjob out of the deal. Something went horribly right.
Oh btw I took the eighth out of the plastic wrap so I could use it to wrap my red pepper. This can be seen as either pathetic or resourceful.
The important thing is not that we avoid making mistakes, but that we avoid learning from them.
Just peed in the fountain while its snowing. Fell flat on my ass, literally my butt naked ass in a pile of snow. It's safe to say I'm done with drinking on weekdays
I shaved my legs and got a bikini wax, I don't care what I take home as long as it has a penis
I'm pretty sure the Jahovah's witness only came to our door because the front says "Twerk Or Treat"
In fairness you've introduced me to a lot of people I've only met once, for like 5 seconds, while drunk
So now your dad has seen my tits. You could have told me he was coming by to help paint.
I didn't think you'd be painting the kitchen topless.
I couldn't find a shirt I was willing to ruin.
at the hospital. Kevin drank straight from the river
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