He's not gay. He just has bad gaydar and he gaydared himself and was wrong.
Kris Allen: Jason Mraz mixed with John Mayer and a splash of orgasmmm
I wish there was a "friends who have gained the most weight since high school" filter on facebook for when I am feeling fat.
some girl just asked me how to spell unconscious. I really want to know what she was texting.
Oh well. haha. i couldn't really understand what she was saying. i just nodded a lot. i guesss she found that sexy.
gotta love spring break
gotta love slutty girls from the south
well since you're still married, you will be paying for my abortion right?
True life I used my fake as a photo id for my final. My professor told me good luck and laughed. Hope the bouncers are in the St. Patrick's day spirit.
Guy passed out in the lobby with a keychain sharpie hanging from his belt loop. 1 guest came in and wrote on him, then others saw and got in line. I'm not waking him up.
The foreigner finally woke up and the first thing he did was look up a map of the u.s. His destination is to pennsylvania.
This bowl of cereal would be the size of a giant's bowl-piece. It's. that. big.
How much did you smoke??
If you can count on one hand the number of times you have actually, truly nearly died this month, then you are not really living yet.
It would have to be recorded, because that sex tape would be humanity's primary evidence of miracles
We should get Al Michaels to provide commentary for it.
my new game is to try to use the phrase "explosion in your mouth". as much as possible on tinder.
He's hot, clean, can actually cook, and best of all isn't a narcissistic prick. I found a unicorn.
Ride that fucker.
These girls next to us are doing shots called bath salts. Sadly this is the classiest bar I've been to since i moved to PA
Randomize
