nothing this campus sells is worth it. not even sex.
You drew a self portrait of yourself on his wall with sharpie.
So all semester this guy and girl have been talking, and today is the last class and we are doing nothing. I would have skipped but I want to see if he seals the deal or pusses out. It's like a season finale.
I picked her up for our first date on a fucking horse. Of course I got a BJ.
i feel like our whole relationship was one big acid trip
One of my friends took me out last night for a bday celebration and I just now remembered that a man blew fire balls across the bar in honor of my birthday... How drunk do you have to be to forget that?
We spent a good 10 minutes in the morning looking for my clothes. I ended up taking the bus home in my 6inch heels and his baggy t-shirt. The bus was filled with kids... one of them whistled at me.
And I'd make him talk dirty to me. In Forrest Gump's voice.
Im hitting on this chick at a stoplight when all the sudden. i notice this chick blowing some dude in the backseat.
Alcohol won't break your heart. I mean, unless it's all gone maybe
You took his virginity and then he got lost on his way back to his hotel room... We found him at 3am sitting on the sidewalk crying. Kudos.
Every day I wake up and there is no spectacular morning wood waiting for me I get so sad.
you said, "the pool was totally tequila. and i left my shoe halfway across town. and by shoe i mean car" it appeared to me that you didn't have your shoes or car.
Finally fucked my buddy's mom!! We are both ten years older and for her it really shows but i hit it!!
Come over I need help. I just almost died in an acid flashback while listening to do You Feel Like We Do off of the Frampton Comes Alive album.
Randomize
