New low: just hacked my moms facebook
We dont have to go to dinner or anything gay like that. I just wanna do it.
I absolutely love you.
I'm bakin' bread in my pussy!
What?
I have a yeast infection.
this whole healthcare thing got me thinking.. without knowing it my parents are now going to be paying for my dealer to be able to live..
everytime someone would look at you, you started to try and deep throat your beer bottle.
Haha its ok. When we got back you sat in the car and attempted to tell me in sign language you were blacked out lol
Omg. The nephews found my stripper pole. The scary part is theyre good at it.
your blue lips and tongue was their first indication you were probably underage
HEY THERE IS NO AGE LIMIT ON BLUE SLUSHIES
Yup. We're now banned from TWO of our nation's finest zoos.
he sneezed into my face mid-kiss
Bless his heart
Do you know that you can buy Cialis in Mexico? Best. Honeymoon. Ever.
apparently when we were gone the parents play strip connect 4
I got the beer and the first aid kit. You get the tequila and burn cream. We should be set for the camping trip.
It's called life, you pretentious bitch. Grow up.
He’s over 6 feet has amazing posture and went to Harvard and has an awesome job and a great dick and loves Jesus and is an organ donor
Is this the guy you have listed as free food in your phone
Noooo he’s listed as free food #5
Randomize
