He said he used to draw on the walls with poop when he was a kid.
Its a long story, but I have superglue on my tongue
I must say your penis is just as photogenic as you
So after I pop out this baby we need to just go on a monthlong coke binge so I can get skinny again before vegas
he said he wants to do me james and the giant peach style. im afraid of what that means. but moderately excited. wish me luck.
You stuck your entire fist into a full jar of peanut butter and starting assaulting people
It's official, I need to start putting my vagina's needs before my own.
Just showered now I smell like berries instead of shame
My roommates just built a mini golf course upstairs while I was sleeping.
I plan on showing these boobs to so many people that by the end of it ill just have a shirt of beads.
Oh and no more ball pics to my family. Got in a little trouble over that. They have no sense of humor.
I'm hungry, horney and thirsty. Pick two you want to help out with.(please pick horney)
I'm sending you a dick pic. Ill tell the other ppl in this pancheros its cool
Don't send a pic of dick unless it's inside the burrito
He turned on read receipts specifically so i'd know he was ignoring me.
You wanna explain to me why there is a banana shoved down my pants?
Randomize
