some 7 year old just told me his favorite rapper was eminem and kim got what she deserved...god damn today's youth is in a dark period
I was about to go down on her and her dong flopped out and hit me in the chin. This may have a Nam like post-traumatic-stress-disorder effect on me.
i woke up with a shirt on. the kids in my daycare group had a lot of questions when i took off my shirt at the pool to reveal "property of brittany" written on my chest and an arrow pointing to my dick.
Anything that's based on a blow job I'm in favor of.
I wouldn't necessarily call it an addiction, more of a passion. I'm habitually passionate.
We made a drinking game out of poaching eggs. When did our life turn into a really awesome version of Top Chef?
By the grace of god and the ingenuity of Alexander Graham Bell, this text message is made possibe: YOU ARE A WHORE
Apparently, there is a horrible ghonorrea out break at our school. Woo! What a way for Loyola to welcome us back.
It involved homemade coconut rum, a waterfall, and street signs. I'll leave the rest to your capable imagination.
you kept going on about how you couldnt haven been the one throwing up because you were peeing in circles.
You told me to pour the Gatorade on you "like Flashdance"
I GOT MY PERIOD THIS IS A GLORIOUS DAY I AM TOTALLY GOING TO MAKE PIES TO CELEBRATE THAT THERE ARE NO REPUBLICANS IN MY UTERUS!
I don't remember where I was but I remembered that I hated everyone there
It gave me the St Patrick's Day nickname Slutty McShitfaced. I've never felt so understood.
I ate mushroom chocolates & went to the botanical gardens for Christmas. HAPPY FUCKING HOLIDAYS
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