i never knew gatorade would taste just as good on the way back up
I sometimes wonder how many of the girls I know have done anal...and why none of them have ever dated me.
why is there a handicap sign in the bathtub and an exit sign in the kitchen?
lets deal with that after we figure out where i am
Well, find something you can use as a snorkel and be aware of your surroundings.
I may or may not have traded sexual favors for Disney on Ice tickets.
My Valentine's Day plans just drastically changed... My F buddy just ran into my gf...in my driveway.
Finally hooked up w/ that yoga instructor chick. Got a little more than I expected. Like a full on bush more than I expected. How do you tell a girl that her bush scares you?
I have a test in the morning in sign language about signs for drugs and alcohol use. Im drunk and rolling a blunt. I've never felt so confident about a grade in my life.
There is a 97.5% chance that my sketchy roommate is also a hooker.
So when can I meet her?
I stopped hooking up with him and ran to the bathroom to throw up. He saw me throwing up and it made him throw up
Don't worry, I'm taking the best gay radar in the World, my sister's boobs. All guy who is not looking at them, it's fair play for us.
Having to crawl on my hands and knees because I woke up with a mysterious broken foot this morning...
I am praying to every god I can that he drank so much that he won't even remember me
She's Jesus crazy. And one if not more other forms of crazy. She's 2.5+ crazy.
i love you and all, but can that be the last orgy with your wife?
Randomize
