Just got yelled at by a priest...again.
i googled "the goonies drinking game." i may be alone, but i'm living the college dream.
Caught my drug dealer jacking off. I think this is a new step in our relationship
The view from the bathroom floor this morning is fabulous
just bought 2000 rhinestones and a heart shaped stencil at Micheals...I think the cashier knows i'm Vajazzling
I wanna throw up and cum in that order
We're having chugging races with long island ice tea, I won. To often
You will never truly trust yourself until you have shaved your armpits, legs, and vagina in the dark.
she visited to give me a bj between clients. Social work at its finest.
Me and you. The most fucked up people on the planet drinking together. Hell yeah
I need a drink. No, several. I need several drinks. Drunk, I need to be drunk. Definitely need to be drunk
Good, I don't think Coke dipped ring pops hold up in the mail anyway.
this isn't the first time i woke up with peanut butter in my butt
After we had sex he gave me a thumbs up... fucking A&M Aggies, man
thanks for not wanting to stay all night or talk or anything, nice to have a fuck buddy who really doesnt take the buddy part serious
I'm all about the fuck
Randomize
