That's why you don't touch shit after fingering somebone
alright got my week's quota of sex in, ready for modern warfare 2
At dinner I grabbed his hand and he screamed "mom she just grabbed my penis" the proceeded to shove my hand down his pants! Hello Mr.Dick!
i just checked to make sure valentines day this year was on a weekend assuming ill want to be drunk all day
hearing about your life makes me feel so good about mine
i suspect the closest i'll get to a valentine this year is a 16 year old on chat roulette asking me to show my tits. step up from last year, i guess.
I might have a beer. Just to keep this hangover on its toes.
You don't have to be drunk! I've licked your asshole before
On an unrelated note: I'm also a big advocate of the "never waste a boner" theory.
thank you for reminding me that I stumbled into a public place drunk at 9am wearing a chicks pants.
It's hard being an adult. And by that I mean it's hard to tell the boy you like who rejected you that you can't share a room with him at white party because you don't want to see him bang other boys.
I'm a drunk white girl and my ancestors were drunk white girls, if we apologized our species would be extinct.
I think I fucked up my elbow when I tried to fight off the paramedics.
Also, totally got laid in my yellow rubber boots and it was awesome.
Yeah, so if you ever try to steal it, just know my tongue's been on it in several occasions. All over it.
Can I bother you for a second.
You always bother me but go on.
Randomize
