So #1 way to come back last night and #2 wishbone and I broke into his house and i opened joey's door and u were both passed out and pantless.
Well listen chief - never again do i want the scenario of going to the ER totally naked and partially drunk to b a possibility.
I just had sex with a black guy. He told me I had a big dick. I think that's God's way of saying it's okay to be gay.
I just smelled my beer. It smells like coming home.
pretty sure that I broke my nose during sexting. Life is grand.
I can't. He's too cute and my tongue is too long.
Just had such a rough shit, don't stop believin had to be played
'Well you know, stuff happens' isn't really an excuse for sticking a cheeto in my ear
Just getting in the shower.... found a "great job" sticker stuck to my boob.
So how was your night?
Found out people don't like it when you get drunk at fundraising auctions and bid in foreign currencies.
How many fucks given?
0.12846
a victory without nudity is not really a victory
He told me to keep watching the Grammys and then went down on me.. I think I'm in love.
It was a strange night. I made out with his college roommate and said "do you care?" beforehand.
I'm hearing voices and sirens. I'm scared. I heard a manatee out there.
Randomize
