I thought it was weird that her dad told me to finish and get out after he walked in on us. I like him
At what point in time did you decide the pot head with Taco Bell was more important than all your friends.
At about the same time you guys weren't burritos.
went for icecream. accidentally deepthroated it. my mom gave me a dirty look, but the kid behind the counter looked impressed
Oh shit. The kids are pole dancing on a broom. It's like I'm seeing my future offspring before my eyes.
Chasing shots by shotgunning beers is not a good idea.
Just remembered when I bought that round of shots I told the girls to "get their whore friend" who was making out with her bf instead of drinking. I don't know why they stayed.
Btw...I puked in my hand last night and threw it on the floor. Don't let me do tequila ever again.
i was drinking at the bar last night with a guy with no bottom teeth, wearing zubas and a polka dotted hat. if that isn't the definition of wisconsin, i dont know what is
I have green food coloring in my hair and just got a text from "Guy in the Yard"...so this morning is going just as you might imagine.
This is most sickening thing I've ever seen, and I threw up my body weight in jello shots on my birthday.
I peed on his girlfriend's loofah during our post-sex shower.
And I told him that even though were not together, if he has sex with anyone I would have sex with someone else, video tape it and send it to him.
Oh Jesus. Are you going to the hospital?
No I'm showering then leaving for Vegas
I got my period during my acid trip. It was weird.
You didn't throw up on me, you threw up on yourself and then tried to give me a hug
Randomize
