At a sweet 16. cant remember what shirt im wearing byt dnt worry im not sleeping w/ the guy who serves the chicken nuggets again
I cleaned out the fridge, had to pound the brews. I am going to be wrecked for my final at 1
As long as you're naked and covered in glow paint, I'm there.
He's so hot and there's so much R Kelly and vodka I think I might die.
You're lucky I'm tired or I'd take a pic of me mounting a reindeer yard decoration
I was woken up in my old house by the new residents ... I don't even have a Key anymore
I got stoned and explored ice caves with a guy who photographs dildos for a living. I win.
i don't find him as attractive when he's dressed as himself...bring back Indiana jones and I would so fuck him again
this is the last time i am going to a 7am booty call
Day two of not drinking, I think my cat is trying to eat me.
Psychosis secondary to sobriety???
Basically all I do anymore is get stoned with my cats, and then we share goldfish.
Everyone thinks it's an okay idea now until I'm overdoing it on the vodka/clubs, dancing on a table, trying to make out with the groom.
Cocaine bath bombs are a really bad idea
Hold on gotta plunge the sink
Is that a euphemism for sex? Either way, have a good time
It baffles me why I still wear white underwear...
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