its not stalking. its research.
just had dinner with my dad's new gf and her daughter.. had to drink a beer to get through it.. she's 19 she has on a disney watch and snowflake earrings
I told her i was enlisting in the air force tomorrow.....it was like the activation code to her vagina
So Easter dinner for me was at 4:40 this morning where i made Bagel Bites and had a glass of Chardonnay
He said he wanted to have butt sex with me and curl up with me after and just be near me. Then he passed out.
I've decided I'm gonna attack people with the toilet plunger.
It's now 8:05 on a Wednesday night and I'm already going home with my bra in my purse.
Well you tried to pay for a drink with your keys for one...
My g-ma saw your dick-pic and wants you to know I've got a keeper. She says her big whopper died in Korea. Good thing g-pa is still asleep.
What we have is to special to throw away over a woman who spreads her butt cheeks on a pool table for me...
Which one of you fucks put a bounty out on my brother's virginity?
I got wine drunk and bought a hedgehog
One of the Mormon boys that comes to the door is really sexy and I always think 'I would absolutely destroy your faith'
Third time this week I've caught co workers dry humping. Quarantine really changes people's priorities.
Replacing my paralegal is easy. Replacing my favorite office fuck toy is a totally different story. Damn him for wanting to better himself instead of being my manwhore
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