brad dismisses pussy with prejudice
As my groomsman, I expect you to learn the Thriller dance with me before next September.
he pointed at my clit and asked with a confused face, 'whats this thingy??"
I am far too drunk to be making a tuna melt . There's blood EVERYWHERE.
It's sad really how 5 am brings with it a distinction from drunken to pathetic.
I'm drinking red wine & feeding anchovies to the dog. I'm really not picky about what kinda of company I'm in.
Either call me back or tell me you're in jail. For fucks sake. If this is a cop, just help out. national league.
I found him with a guitar and his kitten in his room. He was singing a song he'd titled "you're a cat". Guess what most of the lyrics were...
We found Kyle. He was next door yelling at the elderly couple to let him continue his golf game. No more afternoon drinking for him.
It's not that I'm in love with her, so much as I would love to be her lesbian experience.
Oh yes there is. Now I'm the sad one. Please organize my life. And I will demoralize yours.
I wish buying curtains was as easy as buying drugs. I already KNOW what I want and what the outcome will be: awesome.
I felt like the hulk waking up from a black out except with munchies
Step 1: Buy a house Step 2: Turn bedroom into sex dungeon
He bought me a bottle of Malibu. I think I could love this guy.
I've loved people for a lot less.
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