I had a good time, probably would have a bigger headache today if you were in town.
i just got the best bj of my life in the pastors office at church.. Youre right jesus really does love me.
We're exchanging pot brownie recipes in my substance abuse class. This is going to be an awesome 7 weeks.
I would also like to inform you that I can no longer lay on my back because my tailbone is bruised from the nightstand. Good job.
If I end up married to you I better get lots of orgasms to help me forget I failed at life.
That was an excessively violent trivia night
Well it's been 24 hours and I still feel like a mammoth sat on my balls
We did shots with the Tupperware consultant last night. I'd say the night was a success.
So I've discovered that being hungover at 25 feels the same as being hungover at 24. Happy Birthday to me.
exhale infront of a fan. self shotgun.
Didn't pick classes because we were out all weekend...only open course is "alcohol and drug problems". Fucking ironic.
If drinking had a "new high score" I think I hit it this weekend.
Always a gay best friend, never a bridesmaid
Stop recording sex noises and setting them as my ringtones. This time it was at a funeral
He showed up in a Prius. I didn’t even wanna.... So I left.
Randomize
