I lost my shoes and bra and was beyond mapquesting
I wish I had my old roomstes number so I could send him pictures from lastnight... I had a blast banging his "true love" now that I think about it we're even don't worry about that gas bill you didn't pay. Ur girl worked it off!
Found out in my property law class that you can sell your eggs for $8000. Helloooo spring break.
There are two people having sex in one of the showers right now trying to silence their orgasm sounds and failing. Thank you coed bathrooms.
He showed up to fuck me at the same time the pizza guy did. It was like everything I needed just showed up at my stoop.
I'm already mentally preparing myself for the fact that I'll probably be sleeping next to a toilet.
We literaly had to peel your fingers off the jose cuervo bottle and lock it in someones room
did she really put a helmet on, try to make a hole in the wall then pass out on the floor ten minutes later? if thats true ill be there in 15
you know you're a senior when your friends are at the bar before you even get out of class
why the fuck would you go to class? it's karaoke wednesday.
Can you please reassure him im not a scary or intimidating person? And that really my entire life is a series of completely ridiculous events that have led me here?
he got all sad that i was going to fuck his roommate, so i just asked him if it would make him feel better if I let him motor boat me. i am such a saint.
I felt like in order for him to make it to mordor and destroy the ring, he'd have to make sweet sweet love to me in some form of hut or cave.
Aka I'm headed to the liquor store because I don't know how to handle my emotions.
She has an alarming number of pictures with cat ears but the sex is amazing.
If I lock her out of the apartment right now would the neighbors have grounds to sue?
Randomize
